Sharing from my many shelves of journals. The mostly biographical poetry and writing of an Australian Christian woman living with schizoaffective disorder.
Schizoaffective Disorder
Cas Reeves 2017
All the emptiness I offer.
My brokenness I proffer.
All my raw and brittle striving.
My endless hoping and contriving.
Lord, I offer you
The blankness of my medicated mind,
Where memories I search for I can no longer find.
Yet still my faith like fragile fire
Burns on with faint but hot desire.
I turn each day to prayer
In the hope that if I share
You will intervene to fill the void
Made by medication I can’t avoid.
How can I help or heal my mental state?
Is this illness predestined,
Somehow my fate?
I do not know the reason for this test.
I seek to pass, to excel and to invest,
To build a treasure full of hope.
Eternal perspective helps me to cope.
Lord, my blank to your exquisite verse,
I live my faith despite this curse.
In 2014 I had a psychotic break and ended up in and out of the mental ward, I was finally diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and medicated with lithium (mood stabiliser) and seroquel (anti-psychotic). In my case, schizoaffective is a combination of bipolar and schizophrenia. The impact of a traumatic breakdown, mental hospital and medication, with all it’s side effects, left me hollowed out inside, shattered, but I clung onto my faith and I still do everyday.
I'm a 46 year old Christian married mother of two young adults who I had the honour of homeschooling for 12 years. My husband Rodney and I live in Brisbane Australia. I am creating this space to share, as God leads, some of my writing and experiences living with schizoaffective disorder and pursuing a deeper healing relationship with God.
View all posts by cherylcasreeves
Thanks Cheryl for helping me to have an insight into your sufferings! Individual believers in the body of Christ need this awareness to extend love and support to all who suffer 🙏♥️
Cheryl Reeves Writing - from my shelves of journals 
Thanks Cheryl for helping me to have an insight into your sufferings! Individual believers in the body of Christ need this awareness to extend love and support to all who suffer 🙏♥️
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you for you encouragement, I really appreciate it. I hope my sharing can help people and bring glory to God.
LikeLike